Dolor
by Kitsune Hanyou
Summary: Physical torture may be the most immediately inveigling form of torture, but it is a far cry from the most painful.
1. Part 1

Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha or any characters in this story, though I do enjoy borrowing and torturing them.

Ok...people, this is a DARK fic. There are no actual vivid discripitons of the torture, but Inuyasha's reactions should be enough. There are three chapters to this story. Here's part one. People who are squeemish about dark, angsty, h/c fics should leave now. The "hurt" part of this hurt/comfort is in this chapter, the "comfort" comes later. And believe me, there is a LOT of hurt. No flames, please. Constructive critizisim is always welcome.

Dolor

By: Kitsune Hanyou

Part One

Summary: Physical torture may be the most immediately inveigling form of torture, but it is a far cry from the most painful.

Inuyasha crashed into the conscious world. His entire body burned and ached; even the floor that he lay upon sent an excruciating stabbing sensation throughout his already battered body.

Before he opened his eyes, his sluggish painfully throbbing mind attempted to check that all of his senses were working.

Touch was most assuredly working; pain being the only evidence he needed.

Sound—he had to strain slightly, but there were crickets chirping. He didn't know if his hearing had been dulled in any way, but at the very least, he wasn't deaf.

Smell…

His eyes shot open. He couldn't smell anything!

He took in four, quick, deep breaths in his panic, and desperately wished he hadn't. His head spun, his stomach churned, he felt dizzy just lying on the ground. There was a thick, putrid scent that clung into the air, overpowering any and all other scents. It reeked of…

"Naraku," he growled no more than a low rumble in his chest. Though he didn't believe that there were any others in the room, his ears flattened on the top of his head and he bared his fangs.

Again he opened his eyes, carefully, slowly so as not to get himself sick. He was in a room, dark, cold, eerie, Naraku's baleful aura physically crushing against him. A thick, vivid yet dark, violet light filtered through the paper thin walls.

A cocky smirk lit his face and his initial panic began to ebb away. Was Naraku just that stupid! Did he honestly believe that a simple room would hold Inuyasha? He raised one of his clawed hands, ready to tear the door apart, and charged.

About three feet from the door, an indigo-violet bright energy crackled loudly. It held him suspended in mid-air for a moment of intense mind numbing pain, then spat him back across the room, to hit the barrier that shielded that wall, before throwing him to the floor in a writhing, smoldering heap.

A low growl of pain, annoyance, and sudden claustrophobia reverberated deep within his chest. Fear started to rise as he abruptly realized that he had no memory of how he came to be imprisoned in Naraku's fortress. He didn't even remember a confrontation. So how did he get there?

He forced his mind to remain calm. He never would admit it to any living soul, but he did experience fear, the same as anyone, he had simply learned to hide or suppress it; and right now, he was frightened. Enclose places terrified him to the core. A side effect of his tormented childhood, he reasoned. Enclosed places left no room to run, to move. If there was a fight and he wound up backed against a corner, the fight would be over, and he would, most assuredly, not be the victor. He needed the open forests-lots of land and trees. He never understood the human need to confine themselves to small places. Small places held nothing but danger.

He started pacing back and forth; what of Kagome?

His feet stopped moving as his heart sped and his stomach started to burn with a different fear. He couldn't remember what had happened! Had Kagome been with him when he had been taken! If she had, where was she? Was she trapped, same as him, in another one of these damned rooms?

Or had she been left?

And if she had been left, was she wounded? Had Naraku left her, bleeding to death, somewhere in the woods, to be ravaged by wild beasts and lower demons?

Inuyasha's heart constricted painfully, she would call out to him, expecting him to save her, as he always had…as he always would; but he wouldn't be there.

"Naraku!" The angered shriek tore from his throat and shook the very walls of the building that caged him.

And that simply, that _easily_, the door slid open; Naraku stood before Inuyasha. No baboon pelt, just the sinister, human disguised putridly evil demon.

"Inuyasha," the rich, deep, smooth as silk, baritone that was Naraku's voice spoke, "How are you enjoying my hospitality?"

Inuyasha's growl turned menacing as he prepared to attack.

"Come now, Inuyasha," the evil demon chuckled huskily, "you know that won't work."

Yet, Inuyasha didn't listen. He raised his claws and sprang forward, slamming himself straight into the indigo-violet barrier with the same result as before. Again he was short across the room; he hit the barrier on the opposite wall and crumpled to the ground, a heap of red cloth and silver hair. He struggled to his feet and readied himself to make another attempt.

"Come now," Naraku hissed, his voice suddenly cold and harsh, "try again, half-breed, and you shall be severely punished."

Inuyasha laughed hubristically, "I can take anything you try to throw at me!" He leapt again.

Inuyasha had just started his leap when Naraku said, deathly quiet, deadly serious, "Yes, but can Kagome?"

Inuyasha froze mid-flight, letting the barrier throw him once again. Fear for Kagome overrode the pain. He quickly regained his bearings. "What!" He snarled.

Naraku turned casually, "It was your decision, Inuyasha." He strode out and slid the door closed behind him.

"Naraku!" Inuyasha yelled in panic, "No! Naraku, wait! Stop! Kagome!" He rushed to the edge, inches in front of the barrier. "Stop, don't!" He begged. Pride be damned. Naraku had Kagome and he was going to hurt her. "Kagome!"

Hid ears strained to hear every little sound. They twitched when they caught a near silent gasp. It had come from just behind the wall to his right. He rushed to it, to lay his ear against it, but bounced back when he hit yet another barrier. He growled and got as close as he could and listened carefully.

Silence.

His heart pounded painfully loud in his ears.

"No!"

The sharp, shrill cry bit into his sensitive hearing and his hands instinctively clamped over them to protect from the sound. But his panic for the girl who had screamed forced him to recover quickly. "Kagome," he called out, his breath catching in his tightening chest.

"No! Please!" Kagome screamed. "Inuyasha!"

The half-demon's body went rigid at the sound of his name. "Kagome!" He cried, his voice cracking with emotion. She needed him! "Kagome!" What the hell was Naraku doing to her!

Her scream hit a new pitch that sent shockwaves through Inuyasha's body. Then, again, there was silence.

His eyes searched the wall, trying to see through it. "Kagome?" He whispered, putting his hands on the barrier, ignoring the crackling and burning sensation it sent through his palms.

She was crying, sobbing, between perfectly rhythmic gasps of pain.

An image flashed through his mind, and he felt his chest collapse. "No, no, no!" Each "no" came louder, more forcibly than the last. His fists pounded on the barrier, "Naraku, you bastard! Stop!"

Kagome's sobs only got louder, her gasps of pain, only more vocal. Inuyasha felt tears well in his eyes as he continued his futile, relentless pounding. He fell to his knees, sobs racking his body, but his fists still pounded. Tears blinded him, his hands were burned and bleeding, but he didn't care. She was right there, damn it! Calling for him between sobs and gasps. It was driving him insane. It was a wall! One_god-damned_ wall!

He ran his hand down the barrier. It sizzled and crackled with its demonic power, further injuring his bloody hands. "Kagome," he cried, defeated. He hit the wall again, lifelessly, with no real power behind it. All he could do was listen. The powerful, proud, Inuyasha, the half human, youngest son of the Great Demon Lord of the West, reduce to weeping pathetically after failing to protect the only person he truly cared for.

Kagome's gasps and cries suddenly changed, a deep, obviously male groan hit his ears. Inuyasha felt bile rise in his throat. Whoever it was had just finished. There was a soft thump, and a cry from Kagome's voice, the only meaning Inuyasha could extrapolate was that the horrible bastard had not only used her, but thrown her to the floor after, like some worthless whore.

The man laughed,_Naraku's_deep, mocking laugh-to degrade her even more. Then there was silence.

Inuyasha held his breath, it felt like hours before he heard a chocking, despairing, pain-filled sob bite into his sensitive ears. His body shook with Kagome's cries.

"Inuyasha," she whimpered, begging, pleading, with any god she could think of to just let her die. "Inuyasha," she cried softly, "help me."

Inuyasha bonelessly pounded on the barrier again. "Kagome," he cried, "I'm sorry. Please, I'm sorry." He started to growl menacingly at his own helplessness. "I'll kill him. I'll tear him apart with my bare hands!" He leaned his head against the barrier, barely wincing as it burned his cheek. "I'm sorry, Kagome. I'll get us out of here and you can 'sit' me all you want." Inuyasha began to babble sporadically, his sentences not coherent enough to follow.

Kagome gave no recognition. All she did was cry. Inuyasha's soul ached to hold her, to comfort her. She was in pain, so close, and he couldn't even smell her. "Kagome," Inuyasha continued, "I'll get us out of here. I know that…that you can't love me, but when we finish the jewel, I'll wish to be human, then the jewel will be gone and…and maybe you could love me. Like…like I love you."

The girl on the other side gave no answer; the crying continued.

Inuyasha's chest constricted, but before he could continue his hopefully comforting words, the door slid open and the smirking, sadistic demon known as Naraku strode arrogantly in. Inuyasha stood and roughly wiped the tears from his cheeks, though it was still quite obvious that the half-demon had been crying. "What the fuck do you want, Naraku!"

Naraku chuckled deeply, "Tsk, tsk, Inuyasha, do not disrespect again. Or have you so quickly forgotten who meets with the punishment?"

Any quip Inuyasha's mind had conjured died on his lips. He settled for a near silent growl and a slight menacing sneer.

Naraku ignored both, "The girl's scent comforts you, does it not? Is that why you appear so…" his eyes scanned the length of Inuyasha's body superciliously, "discomposed?"

Inuyasha's growl grew more audible.

Naraku's superior smirk widened to reveal his gleaming white teeth. "I'll take that as 'yes'. In that case, I've brought you a gift." Inuyasha's eyes widened and he began to tremble with suppressed rage and concern when Naraku lifted the stained and tattered shirt of Kagome's school uniform. "It disturbs you that much to not smell her, here!" He threw the shirt carelessly through the barrier, "Enjoy." He turned languidly and left, closing the door behind him.

Inuyasha fell back, gagging and could not suppress the urge to vomit as the rancid odor from the shirt hit his nose. Oh, Kagome's scent was there, but it was buried under countless others; the worst of which were: Kagome's fear; her tears; her blood; Naraku's arousal; and worst of all, his seed.

The half-demon crawled backward as quickly as he could, putting the most distance between himself and the foul garment as possible, as if the slight distance would rid the air of the stench.

He pulled his legs to his chest, and let his head fall to his knees. Kagome's soft sobs again reached his ears. _Some protector_. He felt more tears burn at his eyes, but made no attempt to stop them. He failed her. He failed her family. Hell, he even failed his friends. Kagome trusted him with her life! Her mother, even her grandfather who refused to trust him because of his demon heritage made him promise, every time he went through the well into her home, five-hundred years in the future, that he would protect her with his life. Even Miroku, Sango, and little Shippo reminded him daily that if any harm were to come to the girl, Inuyasha would be in trouble.

Not that he needed such threats to protect Kagome. From the moment she looked into his eyes and had the gall to yell at him, while his fangs were bared and his claws ready to strike, that her name was "Kagome" not "Kikyo", he had fallen in love. Kikyo's resurrection only served to complicate everything. The imitation that paraded itself around in Kikyo's image was not the person he had believed he loved fifty years earlier. Had there ever been love between the pair? No. It had been a mutual sympathy; each understanding the other's loneliness and attempting to fill that empty space. He had mistaken that for love. He was a fool. Kikyo, the priestess, pure, hardened by years of fending off demons from the Shikon Jewel, would have never loved a half demon. Love would have stood up against Naraku's deception. Yet, each so readily believed that the other had betrayed them, leaving one dead and the other pinned to a tree, an arrow through his heart for fifty years.

No; that was far from love. Kagome, oh, Kagome…she had not even expected him to trust her when she had first entrusted her life to him. He hadn't even figured out that she was not Kikyo, but she had freed the arrow from his chest, and he destroyed Mistress Centipede, saving her life for the first time.

He had saved her from countless demons, his own brother, angry villagers, even Koga, that damn wolf, since then. Why couldn't that wimpy wolf tell what every other fucking demon, even Naraku, could! Inuyasha had laid claim to Kagome long before they had met Shippo, let alone Koga.

Not that Kagome would ever love him in return. He had known that from the start. He couldn't ask to do that. He wouldn't ask her to demean herself to loving a half-breed. She was too good for that. No matter how much it pained him, he accepted that fact. He would love her, even with his dying breath, with enough fervor for the both of them.

It felt like days that Inuyasha just sat there, curled tightly into a ball, his senses invaded by the putrid shirt and Kagome's pain-filled, desperate cries. Naraku had not appeared again, driving Inuyasha further and further into a guilty rage. Kagome was five feet from him, he could hear it! Only Naraku was sadistic and coward enough to devise a torture that didn't require laying a single hand on Inuyasha. At least Inuyasha could have defended himself.

Inuyasha's ears perked up at the sound of a door slamming into the end of its tracks. His eyes instantly snapped to the room's single door, but it was firmly closed. His heart skipped a beat when he heard a gap and strangled cry from beyond the wall. "No, Naraku you bastard! Don't!" Inuyasha yelled, his voice weak and horse from he prolonged absence of food, water, and sleep, and his constant babbling of comforting words. He pounded against the barrier, reopening the burns and cuts of his badly wounded hands, "Stop!"

He heard Kagome begging for her life, telling Naraku that Inuyasha would come for her. Inuyasha's heart sank.

"He isn't coming," Naraku answered, laughing. "He's left you here, to die. To let me have you, _use_ you as I please, until I am bored and decide to rid myself of you."

"No, Kagome!" Inuyasha yelled franticly, "I'm here! Hold on!" He clawed at the unyielding barrier, "Hold on!"

Inuyasha collapsed into sobs as he heard Kagome's scream eclipse all other sounds. "Kagome," he begged.

Kagome cried out his name over and over until he heard a loud slap and Naraku's voice, "He's not coming for you, whore, so shut up."

The girl continued to cry, but no longer called for her savior.

Inuyasha curled into a tighter ball on the floor, painfully crushing his hands over his ears, his claws digging into their tender flesh, trying to block the sounds from echoing through his mind.

He bolted to his feet when he noticed silence surrounding him. Panic overtook him. He strained his highly sensitive ears, trying to hear a heartbeat, breathing, crying, anything. But beyond the wall, there was only silence.

"Kagome?" He breathed, terrified of the meaning the silence brought. He hit the barrier, as if the action would somehow get a different result.

It didn't.

The deafening stillness suffocated him, making his sobs sound like thunder in his ears. He curled farther and farther into himself, until exhaustion finally won.

* * *

"Hurry! We have to be quick. Naraku is coming!" 

Inuyasha opened his eyes slowly, he recognized that voice, but his vision was blurred from exhaustion, and his nose only smelled Kagome's soiled shirt.

He felt hands grabbing him, but didn't fight back. He no longer cared.

"Inuyasha, come on!"

A female voice; though not the one that really mattered. He remained still.

"Miroku, help me. He's hurt!"

Another pair of hands was on him, lifting him to his feet and dragging him from his prison.

"Kagome," Inuyasha forced through his lips. _Forget about me, help her_.

His friends paused for a moment, but didn't listen. They continued to drag him from the room.

They wouldn't leave without rescuing Kagome. He trusted them. He couldn't save Kagome, they would.

Again he allowed the blackness to overtake him.

* * *

A/N:Sighs: So, there's part one. Part two should be out shortly. Please review. If you liked it, say so. If you hate it...eh, its another number on the board. I wrote this when I was very angry at my job. I'm an angry writer. It gets out all of that repressed agression I get from working at a high school. Students are mean. 

Please review!


	2. Part 2

Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha or any characters in this story, though I do enjoy borrowing and torturing them.

Dolor

By: Kitsune Hanyou

Part 2

Summary: Physical torture may be the most immediately inveigling form of torture, but it is a far cry from the most painful.

* * *

Pain. That's all he could feel. Not excruciating, nothing intolerable. Really, it was just a dull ache throughout his body. 

Inuyasha cautiously opened his eyes. He wasn't in Naraku's prison! He sat up, a little too quickly; he was in Kaede's hut! He had been laying on a comfortable futon, his hands bound in cloth, healing, with a thick salve smeared on his cheek and ears.

"Inuyasha," Kaede's old, soothing voice said, "Ye must rest and regain your strength."

Inuyasha didn't pay the old woman any heed. His eyes searched the hut, something important was missing. "Where's Kagome?"

The old woman hesitated for too long.

"Where the hell is Kagome?" He yelled.

His friends must have heard the commotion, because Miroku, Sango and Shippo came running through the door.

Inuyasha's fury moved to them. "Where's Kagome? Why isn't she here?"

Shippo looked sadly to Sango, who looked to Miroku. "She isn't here, Inuyasha," the monk said softly.

"Why not?"

"Inuyasha, calm—"

"NO! Where is she?" A sudden thought struck him. "You did help her? You got her?" His voice was frightened and small. _They couldn't have left her! Not her. Oh, Gods, not there._

"Got her?" Sango asked, "From where?"

Inuyasha's eyes widened, "You di—You_ left _her_ there_!" _They did…they left her._

"Left Kagome where?" Miroku asked.

Inuyasha started to tear the bandages off his hands, _Fucking bastards! You call yourselves friends? _"Naraku's fortress, you bastards! You left here there. I have to find it." He started to leave the hut, but the three blocked his way. _No matter how long it takes, Kagome, I'll find it. I'll get you out of there._

"Inuyasha, it's been four days, you'll never find Naraku, Kagome is—"

Something inside the half-demon snapped and his knees weakened enough to have him collapse to the floor, not bothering to pay attention to the rest of Miroku's sentence. "Four…four days? I've been asleep for four days?" _No…she couldn't…_

"Yes, and—"

A sob tore from his throat, "She…she's gone. Kagome's gone. Kagome…" _She's dead. She has to be. It's been too long. I failed. I failed again. I should have saved her. Why…why couldn't I save her?_

Shippo started to whine, "But I thought Kagome just went—"

"Home?" Inuyasha looked up, his eyes begging for his last shred of hope. _They did! They saved her! Thank the gods. I can still help Kagome. Whatever I have to do; I can still help her._

"I'm here," Kagome's voice said. It was soft, dead, flat sounding.

Inuyasha's ears perked up at the melodious symphony of the beloved voice, he looked up, praising every god for keeping her alive, until he saw her face. His smile fell and his ears flattened against his skull. She was pale, deep circles etched into the skin under her eyes, and she was thin, too thin. She hadn't eaten in days. He didn't dare breath in the air around her. Her eyes held so much concern, so much fear; he couldn't subject her to his reactionto Naraku's horrid stench that would be tainting the once calming, beautifully pure, musky, human perfume that was her's alone. No amount of concoctions from her time would ever mask it. It was inside her, and she would never rid herself of it.

She knelt beside him, her cool hand touched Inuyasha's forehead, he leaned into it gratefully. "How are you feeling?"

_After all Naraku did, she only thinks of me?_ "Kagome, I…" He looked into her eyes, _Gods, Kagome. How can you even stand to be near me? You were beaten, raped…tortured in every way possible…because of me. Don't look at me with so much concern…so much love. I don't deserve it. Hate me. Hit me. Run from me. Don't sit there and bandage my wounds. _He looked away, trying to concentrate on not taking in her scent, his voice was more husky and gruff than he had actually wanted, "Get away from me."

He wanted to cry with her when he heard her first sniffle. He himself didn't know what he was doing. Kagome needed to be held, comforted, cared for. Not shunned. Not turned away.

He looked back to her, her head was down, hair covering those earthy orbs he so often found himself lost in. His voice froze as he saw her tears falling to the floor.

"I'm sorry we weren't fast enough, Inuyasha," she said so silently, his ears hardly caught the sounds. "It was my fault, I wasn't fast enough…"

_**Her **fault! Sh…she thinks its **her** fault. She thinks that what Naraku did to her was her fault?_ "No," Inuyasha breathed, in one quick motion he scooped her into his arms and held her tightly. He kissed her temple, not caring that his friends still occupied the small hut. "No, no, no, Kagome. I'm sorry. I was right there. A-and I couldn't do anything." His shoulders began to shake as tears welled in his eyes, "I couldn't stop him. But I heard all of it. I know what happened. I'm sorry. I meant everything I said. I don't expect anything from you, but I do. As soon as the jewel is finished, I'll become human. I'll learn to live in your time. Please, please forgive me."

Kagome pushed away slightly, Inuyasha looked into her eyes. So much concern…

"What do you mean, what happened, Inuyasha? What are you talking about?"

_Could she not remember?_ Was it possible for her mind to have just erased it?

Then he noticed something far more peculiar:

Her scent was her's and her's alone.

* * *

A/N: Whoo! Part 2: Done. Do y'all hate me now? Just thought I'd give you that short little taste. What do you think so far? 

Review if want me to relinquish my hold on the final chapter!

(I only got 6 for chapter one and it made me sad…make me happy and I'll give you more, that's the way this works.)

One-Mean-Rabbit:holds out a box of tissues: Ah! Thank you, thank you, thank you! My first reviewer(for this story anyway). Keep your glow-y, red-y eyes in your skull. Here's part two. But…you can get mad and yell at me to give you chapter 3…heehee…I love being evil.

KeyToExistance: Thank you very much for the compliment. I try very hard to make what I write both believable and well written. Sometimes I don't succeed…I'm glad that this time someone thinks I did.

Cand: I'm glad you liked it! Kagome is still alive, see? I love angst.

Coldflamez: Yes, I do love to pull and tear and wring as many emotions out of Inuyasha as I can. You know he has them, the show just doesn't exploit all of the angles to get them out of him enough…that's where we come in, oh, yeah. Thank for the review.

TheEvilAshleyness: Ha, I updated. :-P

AttarashiiNekoYoukai: Sango and Miroku just did the rescuing, like they always do to help each other. There's no real explanation in the story…I didn't think of that. Oops. Let's just say, they found a way and got him out. Hm…maybe I'll add a part in part three for that. See? This is why I like reviews, helps me add more to what I've already written. Thanks.


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